Obituary : Lorna Tilton Flanders
The following is an excerpt from the graveside service held Wednesday, June 3.
Lorna Tilton Flanders died on June 1. She was at home, with people who loved her and things that she loved.
As many of you who have come here today to honor and remember already know, Lorna was musical. She was practical. She was creative, quick-witted, persevering. She was helpful to others. Lorna loved the Island and its history. She loved playing the piano and the organ and bell-ringing. She loved going out on a boat and fishing with her husband. She loved her garden and birds - her own, the wild ones at her feeder, and the injured ones that neighbors knew to bring to her, because she would nurse them lovingly back to life.
Lorna was born on the Vineyard on November 18, 1927 to Donald and Alice Tilton. She grew up in Vineyard Haven and graduated from the Tisbury School in 1945. She then went to Bates College in Lewiston, Maine, and received her Bachelor of Arts degree in biology in 1949. She then worked in a lab at the Deaconess Hospital in Boston where she enjoyed city living at Mt. Vernon Street on Beacon Hill.
On June 23, 1951, she married Richard B. Flanders of Chilmark, at the Christ United Methodist Church in Vineyard Haven. The merging of these families including Tilton, Flanders, Mayhew, and Cottle was an Island event. The couple then moved to Levittown, N.Y., so Dick could pursue his career as an aeronautical engineer. He designed airplanes - not something he could do on the Island.
Their daughter, Martha, and son, Steven, were born and raised in Levittown. While Lorna lived there she enjoyed access to the suburban lifestyle and was involved with volunteer work, her church, and her music. The family frequently returned to their Island roots in Vineyard Haven and Chilmark during those years. And Lorna brought her love of the land and plants to their suburban yard, which had the best vegetables and flowers in the neighborhood. Lorna always had a creative knack for making things and she was active with the Cooperative Home Extension there.
In the early 1970s Lorna and Dick returned to the Vineyard and built the house near Stonewall Pond they had always talked about when they picnicked on that land for many years before. They became active in her family's business, Tilton Lumber Company, which had been in the family for several generations.
Tragedy struck, when Dick died of a heart attack in 1978. Lorna had to "carry on" alone for the next 30 years. Supported by family and friends, she managed to persevere through the many challenges of living all those years without her husband.
In her time on the Vineyard, Lorna became a treasure full of Island lore, and would readily share her knowledge, stories, and memorabilia. Her lifelong interest in dolls was well known and she continued to be an active participant in the doll club. She was a mainstay at Parent Trading Company, warmly greeting new generations of Islanders, many of whom were fortunate to be wrapped as infants in her hand-stitched cozy flannel blankets.
Music always was a part of her life and she was organist at the Chilmark Church for many years. She didn't just play notes, others noticed. She had a knack for interpreting the music. She had a feel for it.
She also had a knack for baking. It was well known in Chilmark that when Lorna arrived with a tar-paper cake, the corner pieces were spoken for before she emerged from the car. She loved holidays, especially Christmas, and enjoyed Christmas carols year-round. Lorna was skilled and creative at craftwork - she could make something out of nothing.
"Take what you get and make the best of it," she often told herself and others. She willingly shared her wry sense of humor and observant view of the world for others' benefit. She always was ready with a helping hand. She came to the door of friends' homes with this question: "What can I do to help?"
In the last six months of her life, when Lorna was experiencing physical limitations, she still loved to ride around the Island, exploring roads she had never before traveled or visiting her favorite places. These journeys always included a wealth of informative historical commentary. Her bright eyes beamed whenever she was engaged in conversation about family history, ancestry, and tales of yore.
In her last days at home she watched the birds at her feeder, enjoyed hearing music ("The Sound of Music" was one of her favorites) and appreciated the smells of her garden flowers brought to her bedside: lilies of the valley, lilacs, and just this week, the iris came into bloom.
Lorna was glad to have her family, her children, Martha, Steve and his wife Joy, close to her on the Island. And one of her greatest joys was her grandchildren - Myles and Spencer Thurlow and Genevieve, Alison and Sarah Flanders - whose arrivals she welcomed and whose lives she was delighted to be a part of. She was predeceased by her parents, Donald E. Tilton and Alice M. Tilton, and her sister Barbara. Her brother, Robert F. Tilton, lives in Vineyard Haven.
She also enjoyed her continuing relationship with her adopted family from the Netherlands. The last thing that Martha read to Lorna on Monday evening was a note from them, which said: "Sending positive thoughts your way to wrap you in warmth and love today."
These words capture only a small part of who Lorna was, and the family invites all of you to share your stories and your memories with them and with each other. The family has started a memory book and welcomes you to send your thoughts to Martha Flanders, P.O. Box 865 West Tisbury, MA 02575. It is hoped that succeeding generations will be able to know her through the words of those who knew her during her lifetime.
The family apologizes to those who were not reached in time to attend the service and gathering. Please send a request to the above address for a copy of Lorna's memorial tribute.
Donations may be sent to a wildlife, eldercare, or historical preservation organization of your choice.
