We lost our beloved Carole on June 7 after years of battling a host of illnesses. She beat the cancer that afflicted her some 25 years ago, however, she spent the ensuing years fighting the ailments that rose out the cancer treatment. She was 51 years of age.
She was born in Irvington, N.J. and lived in New Providence, N.J. for 20 years before moving to Plainfield, N.J. after her marriage. She attended and graduated from Allen W. Roberts Elementary School, New Providence High School, Elizabeth General School of Nursing, and Union County College.
Carole is survived by her husband, William Dunscombe, her parents George and Connie Cowan of Edgartown, (formerly of New Providence, N.J.); her siblings: Michael (Peggy) Cowan of Fanwood, N.J., Cynthia (Victor) Kurylak of Tewksbury, N.J., and Christopher (Christine) Cowan of Stirling, N.J. She is also survived by her eight nieces and nephews: Karen, Kathy, Laura, Kevin, Kelly, Peter, James, and John; and her five great nieces and nephews: Kate, Jack, Julia, Hailey and Colin.
Carole was a daughter of the Vineyard in her heart, in love with the spirit of the Island since first coming to our Katama family home in 1979. She spent many wonderful days on the Island, oftentimes to convalesce following some surgery or another. She would spend many days at Memorial Wharf reading books and soaking up the fantastic view of Edgartown Lighthouse and the energy of the bustling harbor. She would always pick up the latest Phillip Craig novel whenever she arrived. She would also purposefully position herself on the front porch, so as to intercept the mailman, the garbage men, the UPS guys, and the passing runners, walkers, and bicyclists on Crocker Drive. She would engage them in a quick chat and everyone left feeling uplifted.
Despite her ailments and challenges, Carole always had a smile, a positive and uplifting outlook, and a genuine concern for your well-being. She was a sympathetic listener and an empathetic friend. She never took pity on herself or allowed others to do so. She had a special gift to help people see the bright side and she used it to great effect during her life.
She seemed to have the sensibilities of an older age. She loved all things beautiful: poetry, song, flowers, and clothing. She was a true, natural beauty and she always took pride and care in the way she dressed and kept up her hair and makeup, even when confined to her bed. The hair dryers couldn't keep up and she burned through one after another. In her teen years, when mini-skirts were the fashion, she was known to leave the house in an "acceptable" outfit, only to stop at her girlfriend's house to change before going to school. You could also see it in the way she decorated her home, kept her gardens, and composed the wonderful hand-written notes she was known for sending. She was a hopeless romantic, "in love with love" as we used to say, and she carried this idealism throughout her life.
She loved music and had the voice of an angel. She participated in all the high school musicals and would always be singing around the house. In her youth she would play" The Hawaiian Wedding Song" every morning as she got ready for school. She loved James Taylor and his connection to the Vineyard. She loved Bing Crosby at Christmas. Even when bedridden, she would burst into song when the inspiration struck her. She had that special ability to sing the high harmony and it was pure and beautiful.
Very early she showed a desire to help others. Her first job was assisting in a local dental office and after high school she went on to become a registered nurse where she worked with the children she so loved in the neo-natal ward. Her medical training served her well even after she could no longer work. She understood her illnesses and treatments as well as her doctors and worked hand-in-hand with them trying to fine-tune her care, right up until the end. She was also a source of knowledge for the rest of the family and we turned to her to help interpret "doctor-speak" and to figure out our own aches and pains.
As the cancer stole her ability to have children or to even adopt, she turned much of that love and attention toward her nieces, nephews, and eventually her great nieces and nephews. They all loved their Auntie Carole and the visits were filled with smiles, laughter, and candy. Halloween was always a special visit to show her this year's costume. She was a wonderful granddaughter as well, spending hours on end with her Grandma Bennett and Grandpa Cowan, taking them to lunch at the local diner, bringing them home-cooked meals, and most often playing cards.
Even though she was a mix of Irish, English, Scottish, German, and Hungarian ancestry, she latched onto her Irish heritage and loved anything and everything Celtic. She would listen to the Irish tenors, collect Irish linen, and eventually took her dream trip to Ireland when her brother Michael was living in London.
When she was forced to a wheelchair she was granted the gift of a canine companion for Independence. Her yellow lab, Brennan, became the apple of her eye and she loved that dog as much as anything in her life. As the two of them spent many days alone together, Carole would talk to Brennan and you would swear he understood exactly what she was saying. Eventually Brennan died and was followed by another special dog named Mackenzie. She recognized the physical and emotional importance of these wonderful assistance animals and as such became a spokesperson for the organization.
Carole was an outstanding cook and followed in her Mother's footsteps when she opened her home-based soup business "My Own Sweet Thyme". She would sell her delicious soups to families and local businesses, which once again brought her into contact with so many people who she touched with her positive and infectious outlook. She was a great baker and was known for her wonderful pies. She was also a source of information for her sister Cynthia as they sorted out recipes together.
She was an individual of great strength, courage and faith, and undoubtedly the bravest person we knew. Her kindness and love were a source of light, happiness, and inspiration to everyone she touched. We will miss her dearly.
