Where do we fit?


To the Editor:

Much has been said about bullying, but there is a social dynamic surrounding the bully that actually makes it possible for the bully to succeed.

Everyone fits into one of the three personality types. Two are pathological and one is healthy.

The first pathological personality is the abusive personality, someone that does not have a strong sense of self and gains their sense of self by asserting power over another in an active agressive manner.

The second is also a pathological personality, and although they don’t initiate the abusive behavior, they accept the behavior of the abusive personality by avoiding all conflicts that the abusive personality creates.

And the third personality is the healthy personality that is assertive because they have a strong sense of self that is not grounded in other people.

In simple terms these three personalities are the ringleader, the bystander, and the victim. Everyone fits into at least one of the three. Which one are you?

Fred Thornbrugh

Vineyard Haven