Is this an idea whose time has come? Or an idea whose time has done gone before it arrived? A few libraries around the country have tested out an event styled as “Find Love in the Library,” an iteration of speed dating wherein women and men share two or three books they heartily recommend, in rotations of five minutes, during which time each temporary couple can decide whether they’re meant to spend another minute more together, ever.
Of course, we can already see disasters in the making: A woman holds up “101 Reasons Why I’m a Vegetarian” and the man across from her flashes “Easy Ways to Taxidermy that Moose You Just Bagged.” Or a guy who loves Proust in the original French is paired for five painful minutes with a gal who reads only chick lit.
At the Oak Bluffs library last Friday night, where bookish speed daters in the 21-to-45 age range were invited to attend, and then again on Saturday afternoon when the 45-plus crowd was beckoned, administrative assistant Carolina Cooney put the cunning little program into play. Twice.
It was a blisteringly cold Friday night. Ms. Cooney initially found a small turnout to be disheartening. But wait! It’s the Vineyard! Everybody shows up after they’ve fed their seven cats, checked the firewood supply in the mud room, shoveled snow banked up behind the car, and texted six friends to meet up at the Wharf later that evening. Ms. Cooney drafted staffers behind the desk to fill in. A few latecomers pushed through the double set of double doors, and at last 11 participants thronged a long table set up with those little pretend candles in the main meeting room.
Ms. Cooney said, “By then we’d forgotten all about the speed-dating part, and just happily shared our reading materials.” To warm up the crowd, program coordinator Nate Luce shared a George Saunders collection of short stories. Ms. Cooney’s personal choice was Nabokov’s “Letters From Vera.” She noted that conversation broke up into smaller groups, the way it tends to do at dinner parties. She deemed the test run an overall success: “We learned that invitations sent by Twitter and Instagram brought a few people in who’d never set foot in this library before!”
Saturday afternoon also took some strange twists and turns. Eight (if you counted this reporter) women drifted in, introducing ourselves if we didn’t already know each other. One woman who looked very datable, regardless of what she was reading, with a mane of long, dark-blond tousled hair, tight jeans, and stylish boots, refrained from taking off her jacket and heavy scarf. She determined there were no men in the mix, and prudently decided to bail.
The rest of us were starved for book talk — our principal reason for coming — and, after partaking of the wonderful banquet of snacks, grouped ourselves around the table. We’d pulled photographer and library hand Ralph Stewart into the fold to be “The Guy.” He was happy to oblige, and in fact had recently read and loved “The Coke Machine: The Dirty Truth Behind the World’s Favorite Soft Drink” by Michael Blanding.
A woman named Olivia said, “I’ve started to dip into spirituality.” She held up “Rules for Aging” by Roger Rosenblatt, and read out loud a paragraph that demonstrated his easily digested wisdom. Next she displayed “Not in God’s Name” by Jonathan Sachs, about violence that erupts in the name of religion. Finally she presented a book devoted to wabi-Sabi, a Japanese discipline of aesthetics, taste, and rules of engagement for living a good and beautiful life.
A reader named Melanie, who has lived here year-round for 22 years, displayed a paperback by Olen Steinhauer called “The Cairo Affair.” She said she loved thrillers mixed with world events. Her son, with a master’s degree in psychology, recommended she read something with more gravitas, and pointed her to “American Pastoral” by Philip Roth. Finally, she was wading through a massive compendium called “Medical Terminology”; she hopes to work at the hospital.
Karen, who I happen to know is a brilliant chiropractor, had everything encouraging to say about David Perlmutter’s book “Brain Maker,” which covers new research on the gastrointestinal tract and its influence on the brain. In a similar vein, Karen recommended “Gut and Psychology Syndrome” by Natasha Campbell McBride, and for her third choice, “One Spirit Medicine” by Alberto Villoldo, about shamanism, inspired by Karen’s recent trip to Ecuador.
Cindy shared “Animal Dreams” by Barbara Kingsolver, “Taking the Leap” by Pema Chodron, and a tattered, seriously ratty old copy of Kahlil Gibran’s “The Prophet.” One of us joked that the volume had obviously been used in a number of 1960s weddings. Melanie quipped, “It could have been one of my weddings!”
Barbara had taken up her granddaughter’s challenge to read “iPad for Seniors,” which she assured us made the whole process of using i-thingies user-friendly. She also extolled “Genius” by Harold Bloom, and “Going Clear” by Lawrence Wright, about the inner workings of Scientology.
The bottom line is that those of us who turned out on that freezing Friday night and the equally frigid Saturday afternoon were principally interested in books. Not that meeting a romantic soulmate wasn’t high on the list for at least some of us. And it would have been dandy to meet that soulmate under those auspices. But it takes two to tango, and for the most part, guys sat this one out.
Was it too cold? Was there a big game on? Or are men just not as interested in reading as women are? The jury is still out, but it would be nice if some version of library speed dating caught on and we could enter a whole Brave New World for meeting one’s future sweetie-pie.
