Island writer Nancy Slonim Aronie unabashedly cries, joyfully guffaws, and requests — in a direct but encouraging way — her writing workshop participants to share their experiences out loud. Even the really painful ones. Especially the really painful ones. “You have to get stuff out,” Aronie has said numerous times, “otherwise, it festers. But you can’t do this if you’re worried that your words will be torn to shreds.”
Nancy is the founder of the Chilmark Writing Workshop. She facilitates Writing From the Heart workshops, outside if weather permits, or inside a lovely light and airy building that stands about 50 feet from the adorable cottage she shares with her husband Joel. Nancy has also taught at Kripalu, Omega, Esalen, and Harvard, and has been a regular contributor to National Public Radio’s “All Things Considered,” and a columnist for multiple newspapers, including The MV Times. Impressive stuff, but one of the most noteworthy things about Nancy is that she listens. And not in an I’m-waiting-to speak sort of way, but in a genuine I-want-to-know-more fashion. This quality of Nancy’s is particularly important these days, as listening seems to have become a lost art, while feeling heard is what most of us want more than anything else.
Nancy knows this on a cellular level, having experienced times when she felt judged for simply sharing her voice. And she isn’t alone. Many people feel unheard, but it’s especially common for folks in marginalized communities, who are often met with discomfort, disbelief, or complete disregard when they share their experiences. Often, they aren’t invited to a seat at the table — their opinions, ideas, and feelings left out of the equation.
Six years ago, Aronie was asked to run her Writing From the Heart workshop for campers from Camp Jabberwocky — the oldest sleep-away camp for people with disabilities in the U.S. Camp Jabberwocky has been successfully running since 1953, providing campers with adventure, friendship, and opportunities to challenge themselves. Aronie wasn’t too keen on the idea at first. “I was worried. I thought, These people are handicapped, this is a writing workshop, what if they can’t write? Or speak?” Aronie said. “I made assumptions about them, like so many people do. But I learned a lot. Handicapped people can be great writers. They have major stories to tell. Good writing is writing from the heart — often coming from deep pain. They have not been listened to, and that pain sits right at the surface.”
Nancy has one rule for her Writing From the Heart workshops: When someone finishes reading their work, the only feedback other participants can provide is what they loved about the piece. Speaking as someone who has participated in more than one of these workshops, I can attest that amazing things happen when we share our experiences and hear other people’s stories. As it is with other Writing From the Heart workshops, the Jabberwocky workshop began with the writers and their counselors sitting in a circle. Once settled, Nancy said, “You’re the writer, you can’t get a D in here. Just write what comes to your mind.”
Next Nancy provided a writing prompt: “the hardest thing.” The campers spent some time thinking, and then, as is often the case, words began to flow. Some campers wrote on their phones, others in notebooks, while some dictated to their counselors. Once finished, the campers’ next step was to share their pieces out loud. Some did so with tremendous effort — simply trying to capture the sound of the words. Some read easily and eloquently, while other pieces were read by the writer’s counselor. Once the campers relaxed a bit, they seemed to become absorbed in their own storytelling.
George wrote on the difficulty he has moving his right leg, and how hard he has to focus just to do so. Yet he also expressed gratitude for the ease of his left leg. Nancy referred to George as a gratitude teacher. Miles wrote in repetition to express the layers of hardship he deals with. Nancy told Miles how powerful the use of repetition can be when trying to emphasize a feeling. Desiree shared that parents don’t teach their children not to stare, and that she wishes they’d ask her questions instead of staring. “People close doors on me,” she shared. Jake said the loss of his grandfather was the hardest thing he’s ever dealt with, and that as much as he misses him and struggles each birthday, he also feels for his mom, because she lost her dad. “You wrote from the heart,” Nancy declared. “Your writing is strong and beautiful.”
Faith Carter, who has been attending Camp Jabberwocky since she was 6 years old, wrote this piece:
The Hardest Thing
The hardest thing in creation is a diamond. They start as coal, and after they are put under immense pressure for just long enough …
They start to glisten. And gleam. And become something precious and sought-after.
Funny thing: Circumstances haven’t changed. Life is still filled with pressure. There is still darkness. The change is internal.
As you glisten, as you gleam, people can’t help but notice. You are precious and sought-after. Your next adventure will soon begin. It may be hard. It may seem insurmountable, but it will be worth it.
Shine diamond, shine!
Each reader was applauded when they were done sharing. “This is writing from the heart,” Nancy reminded the campers. “Tell the writer what you love.” And they did. As feedback was received, many campers were smiling from ear to ear.
The workshop closed with a short meditation and a parting namaste from Nancy. “The highest part of me recognizes the highest part of you,” she said. Smiling and excited to get to their next adventure — swimming — the campers left.
I asked Nancy to share some of the feedback she’s received from campers over the years. “What I hear most often is that people make assumptions about them all the time — like I did — and that they don’t feel seen or heard. But when they come here and get to write and share their stories, they do feel seen and heard. It’s such a privilege and an honor to work with them.”
To learn more about Camp Jabberwocky, visit campjabberwocky.org. To read more about Nancy Slonim Aronie and Writing From the Heart workshops, check out chilmarkwritingworkshop.com.
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Nancy Aronie = Pure Love