Chilmark

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—MV Times

Empty your lungs and take a deep breath. Listen. Wonder. Accept that change and imperfection are inevitable. Ask questions. Have courage and learn.

I want to wish Connie Williams a joyous 90th birthday. Connie is distinguished and learned, wise and compassionate. She is a retired Brandeis University professor of sociology, and a talented ethnographer. Her book, “Black Teenage Mothers: Pregnancy and Childrearing from Their Perspective” (1991), is respectful, enlightening, and engaging. It is not easy to see and distinguish perspectives. Connie is a valuable part of our lobster roll team at the Chilmark Church. We are so lucky to have her as a part of our community. 

This was a difficult week. Creating the story that other people are terrible monsters does not make us safer. Actions can be bad, some are even evil, and I believe every person can be invited to return to their inviolable core of goodness. I don’t believe in monsters. We are way safer when we stop feeding terror and name the harm that needs to be named from a place of love.

The most recent public outburst during and after our select board meeting reminds me that apologizing is a skill, not a talent. We live in too small a place to get away with behaving badly and not become skillful at apologizing — validating that the other person was harmed by your outburst, express remorse, offer to make amends which in some cases might mean acknowledging and getting help managing your response to angry feelings and not doing it again. Apologies take courage and practice. We are imperfect, and surrounded by examples of people ignoring, defensively explaining, blaming, or justifying bad behavior. Imagine if instead that energy went into helping. 

Chilmark library hosts a visit and cooking demonstration with children’s author Melany Kahn on July 20, at 11 am. Melany will read her picture book, “Mason Goes Mushrooming,” in which Mason and his dog hunt for edible mushrooms, among other woodland treasures. Following a Q and A, there will be an interactive exploration of fungi, as participants touch, smell, and observe different mushroom varieties. There will be a cooking demonstration and opportunity to taste. Space is limited. Contact the library to register for this ages-4-and-up event.

Also at the library, Wednesday, July 24, at 4:30 pm, local authors Tom and Joyce Dresser share stories, ingredients, and recipes from codfish soufflé to Sopa do Espírito Santo from their book, “A Culinary History of Martha’s Vineyard.”
“Won’t you please come play with me?” ask the totally adorable goats at Native Earth Teaching Farm. The farm hours: Wednesdays, Saturdays, and Sundays, 10 to 6 pm. Indigo Dye Sundays through August, 1 to 5 pm. Goat Yoga, Mondays 5:30 to 6:30 pm, and Saturdays, 10 to 11 am. 

Many thanks to Sig Van Raan for the following Chilmark Softball report: “Despite foggy skies and a wet field, a full contingent of veteran players and a refreshing amount of newer and younger players showed up for the Sunday morning doubleheader.

The first game was a thriller, ending with the Larry Weiss team holding off Hans Solmssen’s team 6-5. A line drive snagged by the shortstop with runners at second and third ended a very-well-played game of great fielding plays and clutch hitting, and, for softball, very good pitching.

“During game one, the commissioners held a brief conference to reinforce what has become an occasionally controversial debate. A number of years back, we decided that a fly ball hit beyond the field, on the road, would be considered a home run. I officially referred to such a drive as a Kerouac — why? Because it was hit On the Road. From thenceforth, all such drives were referred to as Keruoacs. Every so often, that issue becomes challenged — yet it is now ingrained in our b-laws. Of the very few lefthanded hitters, Ed Eger holds the softball record for Kerouacs — and last year was accorded the Kerouac Award. Rather than stir up further controversy, I decided not to bring up the issue of selling croissants and coffee at Chilmark Softball.”

If you have any Chilmark Town Column suggestions, email Claire Ganz, cganz@live.com.