On My Mind: Finding the unexpected
Fred Waitzkin, part-time Islander and author of “Searching for Bobby Fischer,” told me that for years he had been “oblivious to homeless people. They had become part of the furniture of the New York,...
On My Mind: Thankful
It had been a month since I’d cantered through the hills and fields astride Tex — a giant, almost black Percheron. Over many years, he and I have had a special friendship, and have...
On My Mind: Writer’s pause, a.k.a. writer’s block
In “The Book of Two Ways,” Jodi Picault writes that people are artists because “there’s something inside you that you can’t keep from spilling out. Maybe it comes in the form of sentences, or...
On My Mind: Beyond traditional talk therapy
In good psychotherapy, we feel listened to, understood without judgment, and cared for. In doing so, it helps us feel safer, kinder, wiser, and happier. With the help of cognitive and behavioral tools, we...
On My Mind: Pronouns, gender identity, and our community
Editor’s note: This is a discussion put together by aspiring psychology student Truda Silberstein and edited by Truda Silberstein, Charles Silberstein, and Laura Roosevelt.
Identity
Charles (he/him)
My name is Charles Silberstein. A part of me recoils...
On My Mind: The psychology of violence
At 86, psychiatrist and part-time Vineyarder James Gilligan just published his eighth book, “Holding a Mirror Up to Nature: Shame, Guilt, and Violence in Shakespeare.” For more than 50 years, Dr. Gilligan has studied...
On My Mind: A safe harbor in a storm
Imagine a young Islander whom I will call Becca. She was stationed in Afghanistan, saw her buddies killed, one right next to her. On returning to the Vineyard, she struggled with nightmares and flashbacks....
On My Mind: A newfound awareness of death
“Charlie, you have had several near-death experiences. When that happens, you come back reborn. You are a different person. You need to re-establish your roots, and that takes nurturance and time. Go easy on...
On my mind: Being a hospital patient
Last month, I had a middle-of-the-night dream that turned out to be prophetic: there was an intruder in my house, and he wanted to do me harm. When I woke the next morning at...
On My Mind: Friendship
Most people think of loneliness as a painful state of mind. They may not realize that it is also bad for one’s health. Loneliness puts people at increased risk of depression, dementia, and alcoholism....
On my mind: Secrets
Though she kept it a secret from her mother and grandparents, on a typical night, a 17-year-old Martha’s Vineyard High School student was a blackout drinker. She was filled with shame about “sneaking around...
On My Mind: Children of alcoholics and dysfunctional families
Tolstoy famously wrote that “all happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” No doubt each troubled family is different, and has its own stories and pain, but approximately...
On My Mind: Why I have changed my byline
My wife approached me as I was dressing for work, and told me that she thought it was time that she give up the job of editing my essays. “What? Why?” I asked. I...
On my mind: A bible of alternative treatments in psychiatry
If fortunate, we find teachers in our lives who enhance the way we work and how we see the world. During my training in psychiatry, I found one such teacher, a psychiatrist named Richard...
On My Mind: A public health campaign for the Vineyard
The Island Wide Substance Use Disorder (SUD) Coalition is an association of concerned citizens and health and social service organizations. A public health committee (of which I am a member) has been meeting every...
On My Mind: Room for love and loss at Windemere
In “Being Mortal,” Atul Gawande says that a good geriatrician “always looks at the person’s feet.” We would add that a good geriatrician always looks at a person’s room. At Windemere and perhaps everywhere...
On my mind: How and why we detach from reality
In psychology, the term for detaching from reality is “dissociation.” There is a spectrum on which we all detach. Right now, as I write, I lose awareness of the dog snoring, my cold feet,...
On My Mind: Sugar and mental health
Few people leave my office without the advice to rigorously reduce their sugar and starch intake and to eat more fruits, vegetables, nuts, and fish. I give this advice mostly because time after time,...
On My Mind: The season of envy
For many Islanders, the coming of the summer season can be painful, not just because of the increased work burden, the crowded roads, and the longer lines at the Post Office and the supermarket,...
On my mind: What to do if you have a mentally ill family member?
Here are two facts: First, when there is family involvement in the care of people with serious mental illnesses, everyone does better. Second, family involvement in mental health care does not occur in the...